colorado.

and it all comes back to you.

when i think about you, which is more often than i'd like to admit, i am more of a trainwreck than i had ever thought a random hookup could have brought me to be. but there's still the same old sun in the sky, and the light reflects the same way against the dew in the morning as it did when i was with you.

and if i knew you missed me, i wouldn't feel so bad.

--

i remember when you tried to tell me you were crazy, and i laughed. i laughed because there was no way in hell you were crazy enough to scare me off.

--

fuck, why am i still writing about you. it's one month tomorrow, and i should've let go by now.

and this is all just too honest, and knowing that james still reads this is fucked up. god, there's another one for me to try to forget.

--

...just a sucker for those blue-eyed boys...

--

with you, i think i'm just doing okay because we don't talk anymore. if we hung out, i wouldn't know how to act. i'm sorry for not falling away when you asked me to, or letting go when you told me to. i just tend to take things a little too strongly into my own hands.

--

this is the part where i tell you how badly i just want to move away. i think i've managed to fuck up everything by trying to make something happen, which is INCREDIBLY stupid because i don't even want a boyfriend. what the fuuuuckkk?!

--

lotsoflinebreaks. deal.

--

hope i don't fuck things up with this boy now. he's fucking gorgeous. and he tells funny jokes. and i love jokes. :) but i refuse to force anything.

--

and as for my bbgscrush. fuck that douchebag. >_< fucking indecisive, conflicting asshat.

fucking butterflies when you walk by.


--

since that was all fucking gibberish:
-i still miss you. fuck.
-you're still cute and idk about being 'friends'
-you're gorgeous and i hope that things can work between us. :)
-fuck you, douchebag with a girlname.

that's life.